Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Dead Bodies

I was having lunch at Finn McCools Irish pub yesterday on Main Street in Santa Monica. The place was empty, the bartender was bored, we started chatting...

Bartender: I am recently divorced after eight years of marriage and am new to the dating scene, is it me, or is kinda weird out there?

Me: It's pretty weird. Why, what's happening?

Bartender:  I don't know, I'm trying to figure out the rules of dating these days. Am I supposed to ask a girl for her number, or wait for her to ask me? And once I do get the number, why is it when I call, all I get back is some 2 word text message?  What's that all about?

Me: That's about being non-committal and keeping her options open.

Bartender: I guess. It's amazing that anyone actually makes a real date happen. Though I did go on my first date post-divorce last week.

Me: How'd it go?

Bartender: Good, but she told me this crazy story...

Me: Do tell.

Bartender: We were having dinner and the conversation was going well and then she starts to tell me about a time when she went hiking and found a dead body in the woods.

Me: (Eyes wide with interest) What? Where? How?

Bartender: She went on a hike with her dog in the valley somewhere and she came across a man's body. He had no shirt or shoes on and his torso was bloody from what looked like stab wounds.

Me: What did she do?

Bartender: She was shocked. Said it completely paralyzed her and took her 20 minutes of staring at him before she got it together to call the police.

Me: Whoa. Crazy

Bartender: Yeah she was completely traumatized by the whole thing, still has nightmares -sees the guy chasing her in her dreams.

Me: That's pretty intense first date conversation. How was the mood after that?

Bartender: Ah, kinda creepy actually. I feel like maybe that's a story you should save for the second or third date, don't ya think?

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